Annoyed

Tonight was another night of too much light in my room and I woke up pretty late again. Me and Anna are supposed to be writing the last part of our essay now. But she's sleeping. I wonder when we will finish this stupid thing. I need to pass this shitty subject. Mostly because I don't ever wanna do it again. But also because I obviously need the points. I'm working at 4 so she needs to wake up like now! This is gonna take a while.

Skellhell has summer

I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd
You're gonna hear my voice
When I shout it out loud


Today has been a good day. Haven't done that much, it's nice. I met Daniel though. And that was more than nice. What's also nice is that it's officially summer in Skellhell! =)


Did you read the part where I said I'll always love you?

One year in Skellefteå

So one year in Skellefteå has gone by. The time here has been the best and worst of my life. I've made more new friends than I ever dreamed about. I really had some great moments. But there has also been times when I've wished I hadn't moved here in the first place. That's all part of life though.

My lovelife has taken many wrong turns this year. Starting with me being hung up on the same guy all the way over in Dublin. Thinking I was over him I met someone here. That lasted about 3 months before I realized that it wasn't working out. And yeah, I obviously wasn't over guy number one either. After that, I started liking wrong guy number 2. Where do they all come from? It was a bit harder this time. Liking a good friend but even harder, lying to yourself and everybody about it. It's only November now. I, then and there decided to be single and not care about guys at all. Easier said than done.

It's June now and thinking back, I'm happy I took all those wrong turns. Cos about 2 months ago, I finally took a turn in the right direction. I'm over both guy 1 and guy 2 and I also met a guy who (for a change) is not like my ex-boyfriends. Which makes me think this will work out just fine :)

For the first time in a long time I'm inlove with someone who loves me just as much =)

I love you

I Love You <3

Back to normal

And suddenly everything is like they used to be. They way they should be! =)

Inlove and projects

Just because I'm inlove..

Projectworks are really getting to me now. I'm so sick of it all. It was fun while we were doing it, but now? Writing an essay? 10 freaking pages? Give me a break will ya. Isn't it enough with a 20 min presentation? Apperently not. School ftw.

So tomorrow is the graduation party. I wonder who's gonna be here after the summer and who's leaving.. I guess we'll see.

I do need you

So what if I care?
So what if I still want you to be there?

I know I can't change your mind.
I just hope some day you'll realize what you've left behind.
This friendship has reached the end of the line.
Somehow, now I remember seeing the stop sign.
I don't know who to blame, but either way I'm sorry.
Whatever happens you know I'll be here for you, so don't you worry.
Nothing will ever be the same.
We don't talk as much and that's a shame.
You were the one to make me happy, but now you don't know what to say.
But that's okey because I've found someone else to make my day.

Sugar

Look into my eyes you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart, search your soul
When you find me there you'll search no more
Don't tell me it's not worth trying for
You can't tell me it's not worth dying for
You know it's true
Everything I do, I do it for you

I said I'd use it =P

Give me a break

I'm not gonna do your fucking work for you! I just wanna get this over and done with, get it? Either you help or you're not part of this anymore. It's as simple as that.

The last bandrelease (we're gonna help with anyway) is finally over and done with. It's gonna be sent out tomorrow morning, but we (me and Martin) finished it yesterday. Go us! Now it's just the essay and the oral presentation (god help us). Nah we should be alright.. once we start doing it.

Speechless

You've got something over me
Right now it's all a mystery
This things taken over you see
No matter what I do
I'm speechless over you
It don't make any sense at all
But I'm here to always take the fall
Baby...here's the proof
No matter what you do
I'm speechless over you


Party last night. The night started out a bit quiet but the more we drank, the more fun we had. I think everyone was pretty drunk when we left for Traversen. Especially my lovely boyfriend (a bit too much to drink maybe? =)) Haha the walk to the pub was an adventure of itself, but it was so much fun! However, once we got there I was the one starting to drink (a bit too much) and Daniel settled with water for the rest of the night. I think I was dancing quite alot with Simon and Fredrik. After a while I had ooze too far up so I gave away my drink and started drinking water too. But it was a while ago since I was really drunk so it was fun!

I'm so tired right now. And I'm working tonight, which should be fun. But still. I'm gonna be dead when I get home, thank god I can relax tomorrow. Combined with studying of course. Shouldn't be too bad though. Once I get started I mean =P
Anyway, shower for the win.
XxxX


You try to read me
You try to figure out
You try to breath me,
but you can't blow me out
You try to feel me,
but I'm so out of touch
I wont be falling,
you won't have to pick me up

My nearest and dearest

Cissi - My world stops turning without you


Alexandra - My Bimbolicious!


Malin - Alla vet att underbart är kort.. My little Doll.


Åsa - Bestest sis in the whole wide world!


Anna - More than just Amazing ;)

Marie - Well, what can I say? =) I'm never gonna leave your side.

Friends ask why you're crying
Best friends already have a shovel
ready to bury the loser who made you cry

Thnx for always having that shovel ready <3


The seminare is finally over and done. Thank god!! Dunnow really how it went but I don't care. I'm just as happy that I've survived it! =) Anyway, Annas going home today for her mums birthdayparty. Which leaves me alone here until Tuesday *sigh*. But I have my Daniel (and the rest of my friends of course) so I'll live :) We're gonna watch the second Pirates movie tonight (so we can go to the cinema and watch the third one).
Oh and I got my new keyboard yesterday. For some reason I got a new mouse as well, so now I have a spare one :) Hmm.. a song maybe? I'm gonna look for a perfect song to put down here. Today it WILL be a Westlife song. I'm in such a Westlife mood now, I so wanna see them soon again. Bring on the 2008 tour! (nu helst!)
Oh and we (my lovely team=the best team) worked at the pub last night. The funniest thing ever. I think it was a long time ago since I had that much fun =) I needed that.


I've had enough of not believing
Living life without a meaning
I want something real that I'm feeling when I'm next to you
Lets build a house of love and devotion
A window to my hearts emotion
Until the very end it's the place I'm gonna keep you in

Oooh, I'm almost awake now. I'm so tired. Will probably sleep soon cos I won't be able to stay awake for much longer. I don't know anymore. Gaaaah. Take me away!


So much confusion
Circling inside my head
What this one and that one said
It's all an illusion cause I'm still the same person
No matter how fast I run
And I'm trying to hold on to where it is I've come from


Sorry you feel that way, I wish I could do something about it. But all I can be is myself.. And if that's not good enough for you, then.. there's not much I can do. Sorry.


Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you
But you don't understand

Now it's just too late and
We can't go back I'm sorry
I can't be perfect


However, life is brilliant apart from this shit. I love all my friends that are still there for me =)


Daniel, Anna, Cissi, Marie, Ztanz, Wii, Läcki, Malin, Emma.. Love you all <3

I wanna hold you
Until the fear in me subsides

Sooo.. today has been one of these relaxing days. Wasn't meant to be though =P Stayed over at Daniels so I had to get up kinda early today so I had time to go home before going to school. The MMM lesson was fun. But I was so tired! My own fault.. hehe, I could have gone home early last night.. but I didn't ;) So anyways.. I don't have that much to write, honestly. Right now I'm just listening to music and think about doing something. It feels kinda good now, with school I mean. Just a few weeks left now =) But then it's summer holiday and I've still got no clue what I'm gonna do. Fuckin hell! My luck huh? Ah well. I guess the people at home will be happy that I probs will be there most of the summer.

Under my feelings under my skin
Under the thoughts from within
Learning the subtext of the mind
See creation how we're defined

My Darling, who knew?

Phösarsittning, well it wasn't as good as I hoped it'd be. But I don't for one second regret going there. I still had fun. Especially when we, in the middle of the night (early morning), decided to play footie on this fake grass footballpitch. Most of the skellhell people were there and it was so much fun! I think I fell over a couple of times and got those small black rubber thingies stuck in my fluff =P But who cares. It's okey as long as you have fun, right? =) Haha! So anyways, got home like 2 hours ago. And I'm really tired, early night tonight.

Someone told me that true friends never leave your side (thank you!), so how come you did? The more I think about it, the more confused I get. It does hurt me you know, the way you don't care anymore. If anything ever happened to you, I'd be on the first plane home and you know that! I made that promise before I left and you know as well as I do that I don't break promises. Especially not after everything we've been through.. I guess you just don't value our friendship and much as I do. Your loss?

Cissi, why did they get lives? Why are we the only ones stuck in the same freaking place? When did everything get to serious? =( Thanks for still being yourself. Much appreciated.

I've got nothing more "fun" to write this time. Over and out..

It was so nice to sleep. I think I slept until Anna went to work. But then for some reason I fell asleep again after waking up. Lovely.
Phösarsittning today. It's gonna be so much fun. I just hope I won't be disappointed. Don't think I'll though. But anyway.
Had a nice talk yesterday. Felt good :)



The things we did, the things we said
Keep comin' back to me and make me smile again
You showed me how to face the truth
Everything that's good in me I owe to you

I walk along these empty streets
There is not a second you're not here with me
The love you gave, the praise you showed
Will always give me strength and be my corner stone


For the first time it's not you who can heal me..

The suckiness of it all

Just imagine the keyboard to your computer breaking down in the middle of you writing something. Can it get worse? Yes it can! You eventually realize that it's not just the battery, it's actually broken. *sigh* You ring the support number (of course you are a regular customer) *sigh again* They tell you that the keyboard is broken (like you haven't noticed already) and they tell you that they will send a new one. *yay* It could take up to 10 working days. *shit* You realize that you have all the project works on your computer and this is really bad. what do you do? ohyeah, you and your puppy eyes ask your amazingly nice friend Ztanz if you could borrow a keyboard from him. And yeah you can. Otherwise I wouldn't be writing this now. It's all great timing here.. I just don't know anymore.

However, me and Anna went to Traversen today. It was completely dead and I almost fell asleep. Especially since I was cuddling up to Daniel. It kinda makes you comfortable and not in a dancing around mood =)

It's the third time now. Third times a charm, isn't it? I sure hope it is anyway. I can't take being burned another time. Somehow I know it's different this time..

I'm so tired right now.. but it would be no point going to bed. I can't sleep anyway. I sometimes can't fall asleep for some weird unknown reason. I guess I just think and worry too much *sigh* Why me?


Baby, I'm the worrying kind

Why should I feel bad? You're the one who stopped talking to me. Where have you gone anyways? I'm not the one to desert friends, but you disappeared on me. Ah well. Nothing lasts forever I guess.

Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating

And I'm wondering what you're dreaming

Wondering if it's me you're seeing

And then I kiss your eyes

And thank God we're together

I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever

Forever and ever

That song brings back so many good memories. I'll never forget me and Sheena singing it on Nicko's 21st. Sharing a mic to the karaoke machine at 5 in the morning.. after having one too many drinks. (I was still hungover when I went to bed the following day)

Wow, that really was a long time ago. October 2005. Loads of things has happened..

I moved away from Dublin, leaving everything there behind (almost)

Sheena and Nicko broke up (he is so better off without her)

I don't have the same bf anymore (again, nothing lasts forever)

I finally took Alans advise and got over Derek (a bit too late), saving myself from yet another heartbreak. I know now it wasn't worth it (everyone does stupid things)

Don't know how many gf's Derek has had since then. But they tend to change quite often (sigh)

Nicko is not my future husband anymore =P Haha. (I wanna divorce =P)

Ah well, the past is gone and the future is yet to come.

And I swear it all over again..

Only for you <3

Today has been one of those days. Knowing you have to study your ass off as soon as you get up. It makes you wanna stay in bed for hours hoping that the work you have to do will be gone when you do get up, or even better, that it has like a miracle been perfectly done already. It never happens though, so yeah I had to get up anyway. But the day went kinda quick, too quick actually. We didn't realize how long time it would take to write all those shitty things. So tomorrow will be all studying as well. Come to think of it, the rest of this term will be studying. Shit!

Don't know what to write. My head is empty from thinking too much.


I've been waiting patiently for him to come and get it
I wonder if he knows that he can say it and I'm with it
I knew I had my mind made up from the very beginning
Catch this opportunity so you and me could feel it 'cos
If you're ready for me boy
You'd better push the button and let me know
Before I get the wrong idea and go
You're gonna miss the freak that I control

Good Morning Sunshines =)


I'm in a great mood today =D Sooo.. yesterday I worked at Traversen. I was soo tired like, but I survived =) It was nice coming home to my bed though. But I can't say it was boring there. I talked to people I haven't talked to in a while :) Was nice.





Anyway, I think I'm going into town today. Since I haven't done that yet =P Haha. I've been planning on doing that like every day this week. But then I always find better things to do ;)





However, I'm looking forward to the phösarsittning next weekend =D




Allow us? <3 Miss you muchness Darlings..

Wow, It's not raining today. First day in ages =P Right now I'm not doing anything at all. But I've been a good girl =D I've cleaned my room and also cleaned the kitchen (go me!) And yeah well I'm planning on going into town later on and then after that våldgästa Daniel =P Hope he doesn't mind ;) But it's true what he said, there's no point cos he has to open the door for me =P So I guess I should say that I'm planning on visiting him instead =D

However, the cinema yesterday was nice. Good film, really =)

Hm Anna has her two friends here now. And they're gonna terrorise me tonight =D Wahey! I hope they get drunk and start doing stupid things so I can laugh at them =S or maybe not.

Nah I'm gonna have a shower now and get ready for whatever might happen.

XxxX

Back home again. It's so nice being back, even though it's been a day full of stress. I'm delighted that it's all finished now and I pray to god (not really) that it will work out just fine.
I spent most of the evening in a terrible mood, or not a good one anyway. And it didn't really help finding out that apperently it makes people feel bad by seeing me (sorry but it wasn't the best thing to say, even though I know you didn't exactly mean it the way it came out) No harm done, not really. I'm fine now =) I just won scrabble 3 times in a row. 3 times a charm? eh? =)

I was going to find a lovely song to put in here since I'm all loved up but yeah I don't know which one. But still, any Westlife song will do. It's gonna be a Ronan song though when I think about it.
I should sleep, I really shouldn't sit here and do nothing. Or I don't do nothing, but still. I hate to say that tonight I did feel a bit sick. But I really hope that I won't get a cold or whatever. Not now anyways.


That's the way you make me feel
It's better than I've ever known it
Better than it's ever been
I can't seem to control it, no
It's the way you make me feel
Like the sun coming up in the morning
Like holding the world in your hands
In a way I could never imagine
It's the way you make me feel

Me and Cissi went on one of our walks last night =P We didn't go to our second home though. We'll do that later this summer. Instead we went through the town down to the river and then up through the estate between Johannelund and town and after that back through town and we also stayed and talked next to my traffic lights. Many eh not so very nice photos were taken. No comment about them though.

I don't really have that much to write.. only that I'm going home today and that it's gonna be really nice =) Can't wait to go to the airport and do a bit of people watching =P ah well..

Over and out. XxxX

I'm minding the little puppy again. I was going to my mum like eh now. But they were kinda in a rush so I'm going there tonight instead. Gotta call my stepdad - note to self. Actually I'm calling now or I'll forget about it. Over and done.

The little one is sleeping now, after playing outside. But this time I won't fall asleep like I did before haha. I should go out with him again soon. Anyway, to other stuff.

It's gonna be nice going home again, well yeah, I know it's still a few days left but I miss Skellefteå. Ok, I don't miss the town obviously. I miss all my friends up there (or atleast some of them) And I miss Daniel the most =) But you know that already.

Soo.. nothing new here. I'm gonna find a pic to have on msn. Since I'm gonna be stuck here for a while now. Or stuck is the wrong word to use =P I like it here. My sis is the bestest ever =D

As usual I only write crap here. I've got nothing better to do of course =) Soo.. enough I think.

XxxX

This is my 100th blogpost :P (interesting?!) Anyway, I'm at home now :) I really wish I could be in 2 places at once.

Hm this won't be a post where I write all those depressing things like missing people (even though I do) Nah I'm gonna write about nice things.

For example, had a very nice conversation yesterday evening/night :) I miss you.

I'm at my sisters now and I have one sleeping sis, 2 sleeping cats and 1 sleeping puppy here to entertain me =P Wow.. I'm so bored right now. Guess that's why I'm writing in my blog. Well of course I wanna update you all two or three people reading this, haha.

It's really a shame that I can't see all my friends while I'm here. I keep forgetting that people actually have lives nowadays =P Next time will be better, I promise.

Wohoo, now Daniels sis came online, guess I have someone to talk to =P

All that I want in my life
Is the feeling of peace
Deep within me truly

I took a chance
I let go
I promised myself
That it wouldn't scare me
Miracles appear I know
Now I can see it show
Cause I

Found out what I dreamt of
And I looked it up
At this very moment
What I want is what I've got
Found out what was missing
And I looked it up
And at this very moment,
What I want is what I've got

Life is too short to hold back
I won't live in the past
Being lonely now I know
This is the time of my life
Yes I'm sure
What I want is what I've got

Was at the staffparty last night after a nice day with Daniel :) However, the party was ok. I can't say I love those staffparties but I had a good time anyway.

Right now I'm packing, washing clothes and all those extremly fun things ^o) Going home today. I already stated I can't be in two places at once, although I wish I could. It's gonna be fun going home though.

Cissi - I miss the endless talks and walks in the middle of the night.
and all the drunk nights in town =P
not to mention watching white chicks ;) laughing until we can't breathe.
I really can't cope without you

Marie - Movienights =)

ah well.. :) See ya all in Linköping!


but still.. 7 days without Daniel =(
<3

I really do like you <3

Soo this day is almost over. Or well the night is young (??) it's 5 o'clock though but still :)

I wonder how a plastic-elephant can mean that much =P

Anyway I thought that this would be the perfect way to spend/waste some time but I don't have a clue what to write so yeah.. The End =D


Who can tell the time and place
When you see your soul reflected in their face
It would be a spell you’re under
And it’ll hit you just like thunder

This is way too early to get up. I'm not used to this! Hm come to think about it.. I did choose it myself. But that's only cos I don't wanna work too much tonight or tomorrow. Since I decided last night to go to Traversen tonight =P Hehe!
Anyway music lesson today. Should be fun. But we have a quite long lesson to only have one lecturer. But ah well. I'm off at half 3 so it's grand =)

Hm now suddenly I haven't got a clue what to write in this thing. Last night when I couldn't sleep I came up with loads of things to write but I must have forgotten them.

Btw, I hope you stay too..

Hm I've been sitting here for too long now waiting. And now Anna went so I'm all alone (apart from the other people in here that I don't know)

However, today was fine after all. First we went to school to get a (I came to a rather quick ending last time since someone walked into the room ;)) But I'll continue the very very (eh?) interesting story now.

However, we went to school to get our feedback. I think we did ok, or more than ok since I thought we'd get like 3 points or something. Anyway after that we went to Musikfabriken to meet the Trästock people. We sat there for like 1 hour or something and then we could go again. (what was the point really? 8-)) ehm, then we went into town for a while and to school again. we had that meeting about the project (thats why we needed to get the feedback) so yeah the meeting was fine. He just laughed our errors off and we blamed it on being tired (or what did we say?) After that I went to the computer room we always go to. And that's where I started writing this =P Now I'm home again. After being to Phösarmötet.

Yeah, now I think this is enough =) Happy? ;)

Me likes you

For the first time in a long time I really like someone =) It's quite funny how you just open your eyes =) Anyway it feels great so far. We'll see whatever happens.

Haha I don't know for how long I'll stick to "Singles Forever" Cissi! =P You never know.. =)

I'm just very happy right now! (Even though I was in a bad mood and felt like shit a couple of hours ago. All that is gone now, thank god!)

Idol today. It was fun :) I was standing outside precast room number 1 all day. Making sure that the right person went into the room and the right time. Ohyeah and also made sure that they (the nervous "singers") were at least a bit quiet. It was kinda tiring. I mean, standing there from 10 until I don't know.. 18.15 maybe? With one break.. Ah well. I'm not complaining (as usual)

Don't think I don't know how it feels. Cos I do. I'm in the same situation myself so yeah I really know. But that doesn't mean I'm just gonna sit back and let it happen. I'm still in control of my own life.

And btw, if it's gonna be like this.. then I don't wanna be a part of it. I just wanna live my life. No complications what so ever.

I'm not gonna drink for a while now. Drinking is confusing. Or I get confused when I'm drunk, everytime! I always think that people are serious with what they say/do (stupid of me eh?) I've completely given up on all that shit now. If you want to fool anyone I'm here, all set! Pick me! Someone always choose me anyway. Alright, this time wasn't so bad to be honest, but last time did hurt me. And the time before that.. and then I was sober! (ok maybe drink is not involved, I can easily get fooled anyway)

Nah really, don't bother me. I'm in a bad mood. Mostly because I've just broken a promise to myself (or actually 2). Anyways I promised myself I wouldn't feel this (whatever it is) about anyone ever again. But here we go.. lala. You can always hope though. It's just a phase.

Quotes

"Ja, helst"
"Det var en angenäm upplevelse"
"Anbelanga" (det användes dock i fel form och fel sammanhang)
"Öka takten pojkar"
"Jag har sagt det förrut och jag säger det igen, Manchester nästa år"
"Ja, och det är ju jätteidiotiskt"
"Well.. they're staying here"
"Westlife will be on this very stage very very soon"
"Gul bil!"
"I'm having a chat with a woman here, relax will ya."
"It's 9000 people in here!!"

Hm can't think of more quotes since I should have written this much earlier.

Aberdeen
April 10th

We had to get up quite early to get the bus to Aberdeen. We knew it would take pretty long time to get there since it's across the whole country (??) of Scotland. But I didn't expect it to take 3½ hours (:O) Too long time on a bus. When we finally got there we thought that everything looked exactly the same (honestly it's like going back in time). Anyway we had no clue where to go. Since we didn't have a map (and for some reason we're too proud using one anyway) and the hotel didn't give us an address (which wouldn't have been useful either way since we had no map). We walked around for about an hour (in the wrong side of town I might add) and then we found the tourist information desk. Wahey, we walked in there and talked to the lovely lady :) She told us how to get to the hotel and also which bus we should take to the arena (yes, it was too far away to walk, I admit)
However, we checked into the hotel and our newfound friend at the reception told us that The bros were staying in the very same hotel. Pathetic, I know. Or, I can't find a better word for it. But the fact that she actually told us was quite fun. But the funniest moment is yet to come.
We went to HMV cos I wanted to buy the Bros cd. On our way there we joked about how fun it'd be if they had a signing in there. 2 seconds after that we saw people walk out with autographs. We just stared at each other and started laughing. And yes, of course they were in the signing. So we met them again and told them how wonderful of a country Sweden is and that they should come. They said it's really tempting.
To the concert..
First row wasn't as good as we thought it'd be. (Once more, don't have me started on the arena. The suckiness!!) We sat kinda outside the arena, if that's possible. And the also put another row infront of us (where did the row A tickets go?!) I hate being used to The Globe, I mean, Everywhere else sucks now. I'm also spoilt for being used to be up front. However, once the concert started it was alright anyway :) Everyone loves out Flaggis (a small swedish flag)

April 11th
Last day in Aberdeen, last day of our little tour and last concert. A bit sad. But home is always the best, no matter what they say. And I keep telling myself that it's better to stop while it's still fun. This days seats at the concert were probably the best we had this year. 5th row right in the middle. And Kian laughed at us :D Wohoo. That's nothing new though. The love tour rocked my socks off! =)

April 12th
Going home..
I got stopped at the security check at the airport. First for a random body check. Fine I thought. But Anna is always the one who happens to be the random. After that I happened to be the random check of handluggage as well. "I'm just looking for explosives" I mean, do I look like a terrorist? And she also asked me if I minded her looking through my bag. Did I really have a choice? So I said no of course, so she asked me to open it and then she took out most of the things and yeah was looking for explosives. Then it was a day full of airports and planes. I'm so sick of it all by now. When landed in Stockholm they were playing you raise me up for us :) What a lovely welcome :P

Glasgow
April 5th

Olalala, the day had finally come. Our plans since September would happen at last. Or everything didn't exactly go as planned. But more about that later :) This day was just travelling.
Skellefteå - Stockholm Arlanda
Stockholm Arlanda - London Heathrow
London Heathrow - London Gatwick
London Gatwick - Glasgow (Ohyes)

We arrived at 11 in the evening (night) and went straight to the hotel. I don't think sleeping has ever been so good :)

April 6th
We tried to find Westlifes hotel but instead we ran into Mcfly (ohmy). They were in a rush though to leave the hotel (and Glasgow) so we didn't get a chance to talk or take photos or anything. Anyway, the hotel is like no comment. So we went around town and then to the arena. SECC is a fucking joke, I can't believe it! They simply can't build arenas that will work for concerts. I'm not even gonna get started. So that's it!

April 7th
So I'm getting abit tired of writing this thing so I'm keeping it short (A). Concert this day as well. As good as always. Nothing more happened I think. Or actually, I think this was the day we totally embarrassed ourselves "Öka takten pojkar" haha. Can it get any funnier? We also realized that we have very many private jokes.

April 8th
Last concert in Glasgow which means only 2 more left in Aberdeen. But we decided to go to the Sugababes concert the day between the cities. I mean, what else would we do? It's not exactly fun in Glasgow. (Again, don't get me started) We met the lovely opening act (McDonald bros) And saw the not so very lovely opening act (the unconventionals) The Bros are totally amazingly nice and wonderful. After the concert we saw when they left the arena. (Wow)

April 9th
By this time we had totally given up on Glasgow (and the rest of the scotland btw). We didn't do that much before the Sugababes concert. It wasn't exactly fair to see Sugababes inbetween Westlife concerts. I mean Westlife are so much better. But it was a good concert. Tomorrow it's off to Aberdeen..

It's tomorrow today now (den vanliga logiken finns alltid kvar) I woke up at 9 and just couldn't resist starting the day ;) I have so much to do today which is good or I'd be going nuts =P
First wash some things and watch a dvd, then school, give my keys to Ztanz or Sill, have a shower, eat, clean the kitchen and then we're off =) And I'm pretty sure there is something else as well that I've forgotten to write.. I guess I have to check if I've packed everything I need and all that.

Tomorrow =)

London baby! =) Well first down to Stockholm (tomorrow evening) and then to London (saturday morning). I really can't wait. The list is gonna be sooo much longer, I guess the extension won't come until Glasgow and Aberdeen though. But still =)

There are rumours going round about Westlife NOT recording a tour dvd this year. I wouldn't be surprised if this was the case but I would be truly disappointed. I mean, what is BMG really thinking? More like, what the heck is wrong with them? First ratpack album then the love album and now NO tour dvd? I'm not sure how much of this that has been really Westlife's choice and how much has been BMG's brilliant ideas. *sigh* that pretty much says it all. Ah well, I ain't gonna let this get me down because I'm gonna see Westlife live 7 times anyway. But I can't help to think about all those people that for one reason or another can't go to the UK to see them, poor them! When they used to have their European tour that was one thing.. but now they don't even do a proper tour. I wonder where the future is to be honest. But yeah I'm not gonna let this ruin me and Annas little following Westlife tour.

Anyways, the sooner I go to bed the sooner tomorrow will come =) (not that i'm gonna sleep yet but still =P)

Dear Diary
Today I saw that boy
As he walked by
I thought he smiled at me
And I wondered
Does he know what's in my heart?
I tried to smile but I could hardly breathe
Should I tell him how I feel?
Or would that scare him away? D
iary tell me what to do
Please tell me what to say

I know I shouldn't care, but I do..

I really truly honestly haven't been this confused before in my whole life (just a slight exaggeration)
Major hangover today, only have myself to blame for it, as usual. Can't wait for the Westlife tour.. =) It's gonna be fab!

It's soon now!! =) We're going to London Baby ;)

Well well I guess it was a while ago since I last wrote in this blog. I know that cos Anna told me to write something, or she gave me a hint anyway ;) Haha!
I was working at Traversen last night and that was fun. Funnier than it has been in a long time. Anyway, it's party night tonight. I'm not sure if I'm gonna go mad though, I've got a bit of an headache. But we'll see :) Have fun and meet people anyway. That's always fun. Who cares about the drinks.
Everything feels so good at the momet, no exams to study for anymore =P Wahey! I just hope I passed the exams I did. And if I didn't.. well that's a bridge I cross when I come to it. I think I'm gonna start the party soon ;) Anna has already started drinking =P I should join her instead of writing shit on here.

over and out

I'll be there for you

Well soon I'm off to school. Got a small exam today.. not very fun. But yeah after this it's no more exams soo =P
Got projects and stuff to do instead. But that's soomuch funnier. Oh and yesterday I got my handcuffs ;) They are the sexiness =)

The weekend was so much fun :) Sleepover, lectures, games, spex, fun moments, playing in the snow, nice photos and even nicer people. MMM rules and that's the way it is.
Today was exam day, I think I did quite ok. But you never know if you pass or not. I guess I'll have to wait until I get it back. I don't know really what I should do now, I'm so extremly bored and tired as well. But it's no fun going to bed. I mean, I have a lie in tomorrow =P Ah well.. If nothing funnier than this is happening I might as well sleep.

I'm getting more and more annoyed everytime we talk.. that kind of hurts me a bit cos it used to be so good. I guess I'm ok now and that's why I don't "need" the talks as much anymore. I'm not sure.

I hate it, but I think it's the fact I'm used to having you around me. It's not good. Not at all. I don't wanna be in a situation where I can take you for granted. I wanna fight for things, anything I can have I automatically don't want anymore.. Or maybe I didn't want it to start with but that's not the point.

no hurting emotions. no tears. no regrets. no mistakes. no you and me.

Today:
In an hour or something me, Anna and Pia are going to make some ryggtrycks =P on our eh uniforms? haha. Don't ask =D
After that we have to do a bit of studying aaaand after that we are going to the teambuilding whatever thing in Lövånger :) Let's hope it'll be fun :)

Tomorrow:
The teambuilding thing all day

Day after tomorrow:
Go home from Lövånger :P and study my ass off.

Day after day after tomorrow:
Exam

Anyone wanna do some studying for me? =) It's not that fun, but luckily this time it seems like I'm actually learning it. I know what I can expect from the exam. Or from the person creating the exam maybe. Creating? Wow, now that's a fancy word. I'm impressed by myself. Why isn't anyone talking to me when I'm sitting infront of the computer? Once more I realize that it doesn't matter if I'm online or not. Ah well.. back to the studies I guess

Now it starts all over again. The serious studying part! haha. Not that fun but what can you do about it? I really need to pass the exam and maybe even both of them. And that's what I'm gonna do! So yeah, screw this and next week, and after that I'm gonna start living again!

Yesterday was party night. It was kinda okey. Me and Anna rules the dancefloor as usual (which means no one else was there). Some people just don't know when to feel ditched! Gosh! Well it started out okey, we just had a laugh. But then it started to annoy us. And people wonder why we ran outside ;) haha.



Oh baby you're making a mistake again, oh why?
Don't you understand that everytime you do, you make me cry?

I don't give a fuck about what you think! I think you mistake me for someone who gives a damn. That person is not me!

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

Today has been one of those slacker days. No wonder though. The movienight lasted until 4.30 this morning. Are you really meant to fall asleep? =P Haha! You look adorable when you sleep though =) There was no waking you up! I'm kinda tired now and I'm kinda bored as well. I'm thinking about going back to old habits and watch NCIS and Sex and the city and then hopefully fall asleep. And if I don't fall asleep I always have my Ronan book to read =)


My head's full of thought
Thoughts of you
And I'm distracted so easy
Thinking what to do
So unsure, so unfamiliar
Am I wrong to think that something could happen?

Will you fall for me
I need to know
The way I'd like you to
Baby, will you fall for me
The way I've fallen for you

I’m not like myself
And I'm playing the role of someone else
And my hearts beating so fast I can't stop it
And I’m so unsure, so unfamiliar
Am I wrong to think that something could happen?

[what difference does it make?]

I think I did it again
I made you believe we're more than just friends
Oh baby
It might seem like a crush
But it doesn't mean that I'm serious

'Cause to lose all my senses
That is just so typically me
Oh baby, baby

Oops!.. I did it again
I played with your heart,
Got lost in the game
Oops!.. you think I'm in love
That I'm sent from above
I'm not that innocent

You see my problem is this
I'm dreaming away
Wishing that heroes they truly exist
I cry, watching the days
Can't you see I'm a fool in so many ways

Who's that girl?
Where's she from?
No she can't be the one

I am here for you if you'd only care

You touched my heart you touched my soul

You changed my life and all my goals

And love is blind and that I knew when,

My heart was blinded by you

I've kissed your lips and held your head

Shared your dreams and shared your bed

I know you well, I know your smell

I've been addicted to you

Jag har vaknat mitt i natten av tystnaden
Och hoppats att du sov här bredvid mig igen..


Well well.. I've washed my clothes today. Go me? Nah, not really. That's basically everything I've done since yesterdays cleaning of the flat.


[you can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take]

Today we had a lesson in how to open a locked door without using a key.
This is how you do it:
* Get shocked when you realize that your door locked itself with you on the wrong side of it and with your keys on the other side.
* Go to your flatmates room and tell her about it
* Laugh your ass off, cos believe it or not, it's a crazy situation and it just doesn't happen!
* Try calling Skebo (or whoever you think might be able to help you) and when they don't answer cos it's way later than office hours..
* .. You try to open the door with whatever you find (pins, needles, whatever)
* Realize that it's not gonna work
* Laugh even more (preferably so much that you find it hard to either breathe or stand up)
* Realize that you don't have a clue how to open the door
* Knock on your second flatmates door and ask her to kick in the door for you
* Now you are 3 people standing trying to open the door but more important, you are 3 people having a blast cos of this stupid and funny situation.
* Flatmate number 2 takes the lead and kind of jumps into the door a couple of times
* After a few minutes the door is finally open again and it's not very alive anymore
* Once again, laugh really hard!

So what have we learned from this lesson? Never ever leave your keys in your room when you walk out of it. Or never close the door when you are not in the room.

The very last step is to tell everyone about this funny accident (for example write about it in your blog)

Other guys will come along, they always do..
But what's the point when all I ever want is you? =(

Today I really have to buy a birthday present for Jocke. I just don't know what to buy. I mean he always gets those weird things from me.. but maybe I should give him something nice this year? Haha I guess I just have to go into town and have a look =)

Trust me, I know how it feels. I'll be right here whenever you'll need me. That's a promise from me to you =)


Speaking from experience
I know what you've been through
I know you're hurt
I have been hurt too
Love dies hard
And life goes on
Only time will tell
When to hold on
When to let go
When to forget
And not let it show
When you reach out
I will be there <3

Why does it matter? It's not like they care anyway. If I thought they did, then yeah maybe. But now, not a chance.

A friendship has to go both ways. Can't be a one-way-friendship. Then I'm not interested anymore.

Been talking to Alex pretty much lately. I miss you Darling. (Everybody say awww;)) Hehe.. Of course I miss everyone from back home. You know I do =)

I hear you talking, but your words don't mean a thing

I doubt you ever, put your heart in anything

It's not much to ask for

To get back what I put in

But I chose the waters that I'm in

And it makes no difference

who is right or wrong

I deserve much more than this

'Cause there's only one thing I want

If it's not what you're made of,

You're not what I'm looking for

You were willing, but unable

To give me anymore

There's no way

You're changing

'Cause some things will just never be mine

You're not in love this time

But it's alright..

What's your definition of the one?

What do you really want him to become?

No matter what I sacrifice it's still never enough

Valentines Day
Yay? Well I don't know. I just don't like this day I guess. Probably because I'm alway single for some reason =P haha.. What's weird though is that it's not as bad as it used to be. This year is kinda ok actually. But I don't have my Cissi here. I hope she survives without me (A) Haha.



You should never take more than you give

Saturdays party was fun =) But with my normal luck I was hungover all day yesterday haha. And if that wasn't enough, I got a cold as well. Wohoo, go me? =P
Ah well.. I'll survive. I mean, now I have a reason to relax without being called a slacker. But knowing myself I probably won't relax only cos I really should ^o)
Hmm I don't know what else to write, might update later or something.

And then I'm officially off for like 2 weeks =) If I didn't write that yesterday :S *memory like a goldfish*
Anyways, Anna is going home on monday so I guess I have to entertain myself :P I think I'll survive though. Been through worse ;)
Working at the pub today, hopefully it'll be party tomorrow though =) It was too long ago now (A week) Naah I'm no alco, just like meeting people =)

I'm over and done with the speech =) Wahey! It didn't really go as I planned it, but who cares. It never does, right? =)

Have you ever..?

Had a smile given to you by Kian?
Owned an AAA-pass?
Woken Westlife up by singing?
Seen Dave tie his shoelace only to tie it four more times?
Told Nicky where his wife was when he had lost her in the crowd?
Got Kian to blow you a kiss?
Seen Kian stop in the middle of a crossing just to repack his car?
Been to a training session with Nicky and Georgina?
Measured Nicky's index finger?
Made Kian say that he loves you?
Being filmed by Nicky?
Seen Nicky attack Dave?
Seen Shane force Kian to take a photo with you?
Lended Nicky a flag?
Sen Kian dump his dog?
Seen Nicky crawl through a tiny little hole?
Impressed Nicky?
Given Nicky a pair of gloves in the exact right size?
At the same time given him a great laugh?
Looked at the reflection of yourself in Shane's shades?
And also in Mark's shades?
Had one of Brian's laughters dedicated to you?
Had a wrestling game with Dave?
Informed Nicky about the difference between European version and UK version?
Had some record company dudes bying you dinner?
Kissed Mark?
Been to the cinema with Westlife?
Had a VIP Concert?
Performed a smaller danceshow for Nicky?
Followed Dave in the car?
Discussed Boyzone's future with Louis Walsh?
Watched Winnie The Pooh with Shane?
In the lack of mirrors around, told Brian what he looks like?
Been on a walk with Nicky?
Chased Dave around a pillar?
Seen Brian dressed up at HMV in Dublin when he punk'd Westlife?
Entertained Nicky so much that he forgot to sing?
Seen Mark lean his head to one side for you?
Seen Nicky on the runaway?


Well I have ;)

I'm done with my speech! Well I have been for a while but still. Go me :D

Wohoo.. Feels like I haven't been writing here for a couple of days. Hm maybe because I haven't? Right now I'm working on my incredible Simon Cowell speech (Nah not really). When I grow up (if I ever) I wanna be Simon Cowell =) Just imagine how cool it'd be. I guess everyone who reads this thing knows who Simon is but for those who doesn't.. He is the rude judge of Popstars, PopIdol, American Idol and X-Factor =) There you go ;)

I remember when me and Malin used to watch all those crappy people auditioning for American Idol, just to see Simon slag them off. That was a while ago though. I miss those times. It was us against the world, remember? =)

I better finish cos Emma wants to read =) hehe

Loves you <3

Live @ Campus

It's over and done now. Thank god. Naah it was fun. But the cleaning afterwards was everything except for fun. I must say MMM rocks! =) We pulled it off! Ok my class didn't do too much, much more credit to the 2nd and 3rd graders for working with this for ages.
Nothing much to say about it really. Or maybe I'm just too lazy to write it =P

Over and out

Only for you..<3

Live @ Campus

Finally we have a break. We have to be there at 5 again though cos we will get some info and eat then. The doors open at 7, wohoo.. Right now I'm kinda tired of this. The planning and organisation = ZERO! Ah well I shouldn't complain. I know how it can be. I will update tomorrow and tell you things about the event. Until now we've only been carrying furniture. I'm not looking forward to carrying them back : Ah well..

Over and out.

Bored, Bored and even more BORED!! Gaaah! =(
It's not fun (obviously) ..What should I do?

Feeling fine =)

Tomorrow I'll be there my friend
I'll wake up and start all over again
When everybody else is gone



I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word, you can light up the dark
Try as I may I can never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me wherever I fall
You say it best.. when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd
Try as they may they could never define
What's been said between your heart and mine

Such a wild night last night. It was fun seeing all the drunk people ;) Haha. But I kinda feel sorry for those who really drank too much. Not everything was fun though. Let's just say, what you don't know won't hurt you. Ah well.

Seems like most people found someone to snog last night =P Haha!

Today is a good day =)

I need you that much

I can't even think straight anymore

I'm bored, tired, annoyed and a bit sick. Yay! Life can't get any better, eh?
Party tonight I guess. Should be fun though, maybe that gets me out of this terrible mood I'm in =P Naaah, really It ain't that bad.

If it works I'll be forever greatful =) I'm not too sure it will.. but I still keep my fingers crossed!

However, today has been a good day. Kinda boring though with two lectures and one meeting. Why do they have to take away MMM? =( Seems like they don't want anyone to come to this lovely place. It sucks! How can I tell people to apply for something I wouldn't have applied for? How can I convince them it's gonna be great when the schedule for them sucks? Who wants to come here to study music when basically all economics courses are based in another town?

Well since I know what I know, I know it's worth it. It would be even though they made stupid changes. But there's no freaking way I can convince people that it's worth it if they haven't even been to Campus, Traversen or Skellefteå. They haven't met all the nice people I've met up here and they certainly don't have my lovely friends.

Good Luck Liz - Thanks Liz

Ah no.. not again!
Today started out to be a good day, but slowly turned in to a nightmare.
You don't even realise what you're putting me through. What I'm going through right now.. You juts don't know. And no I don't wanna talk about it, there's nothing to talk about. Get it? I've said everything I have to say. I ain't gonna waste anymore time on this shit. Enough is enough, I just wish you learned where the line is. Or how could you? You crossed it ages ago without realising it. Why am I even being bothered enough to write this? Why do I even think about what you're gonna think? I know I have to take full responsibility for all my actions, I'm fully aware of that. There's no getting out of it. But for godsake there are freaking lines. You have to act within reasons and not make false accusations. To be honest, I think you're losing it as well. Or no, you already lost it.

Wahey!! Yay!! I finally got my life back! (Computer)

Hmm that's everything that happened today really.. well we started one of our new courses today. (Metod rapport språk) Yay? On Friday we'll start with the music course =) Even funnier :P

Tomorrow we're off so we'll probably go into town to get our new books. More than that I don't know. Maybe go to traversen :P Or most likely ;)

Over and out

Omg! Haha I haven't posted anything in ages. Yes yes I know. I suck at this. But then I figured that no one is reading this anyway, apart from Anna. And she (you) already know everything anyway =)

Ah well.. x-mas was nice. New years was ok. Had a few nice (desperate) phonecalls anyway haha. So what else? Life is grand at the moment! I'm loving it! =)

Holy fuck. It was a while ago. Haha. Can't say much has happened though. Only that my computer has really given up on me and filed for a divorce. I might divorce before though cos I'm calling the support number today again. Not that I think they can help me more this time but maybe I have the strenth to tell them that the computer is really broken and that I can't fix it on my own. They need to have a look at it to see what's wrong. If I can make them understand that I should get a nobel prize =) (Yeah, it is that bad) Talking about not having a brain.. 8-)

I'm sitting in school cos I've got nothing better to do. That's kinda sad actually. And I don't know what's happening this weekend either, only that I'm going home on Sunday. So hopefully there will be something going on tonight or tomorrow or I'll have to party on my own ;) Haha! (Which is even sadder to be honest)

Cissi!! I miss you muchness right now. It's gonna be so nice to go home and have a proper talk about stuff. Dontcha think? Ah well.. maybe it's time to say goodbye eh.. end this blog anyway. Take care. Loves you <3

Right now I can't wait to go home. I so hate this. And yeah it's probably my fault, I'm way too nice. I should have said what was on my mind from the start. So I only have myself to blame for not doing that. But how fun is it to hurt someone you care about? Especially when you're doing it on purpose and you know the person will get hurt? It sucks I'm telling you! I've been there too many times already, next time I won't go this far. Or it won't be a next time, more like it. I'm just gonna live and forget about the rest.

Hahahaha.. Ohyeah we had fun =) Party party!!

Yeah! The brevbärare (:P) has become our friend again!! =) Wijoo! BUT.. if he doesn't deliver our concert tickets soon I might have to change my mind :P
Finally we got the dvd today.. hehe ;) It's great!


It wasn’t meant to feel like this

I want the new Dvd now!! (Igår helst =P) But yeah I just wish it will be here by tomorrow. Movienight! Or movieday hehe ;) It's my sisters birthday tomorrow. Wahey!! 22 baby ;)

Another weekend has gone by. I guess time goes fast when you have fun.
Let's see, Friday me and Anna were in town shopping since we didn't have any lessons. We also decided to go to Luleå some day cos this town is so extremly small. Friday night I was working at Traversen. Anna, Pia and Fredrik were there drinking :P
Yesterday me and Anna went to watch Hockey. It was a chaos game as usual when I'm there and Skellefteå AIK lost to Färjestad with 5-1. But since I don't support any of the teams I didn't really care. I was working at Traversen yesterday as well. It was fun both of the nights but it was more people there on the Friday. Oh and I got lift home yesterday :P It was nice.
Sooo today I won't do anything cos I'm so tired. Well I guess going to coop and stuff but nothing too heavy.
So yeah.. XxXx

Thoughts are taking over me

If I don't tell you now?

Life goes on just the way it did before. I'm in the same situation as I was a while ago. I can't believe myself. Guess I'm just the unlucky one or something. It just seems like no one understands me. If you only knew how hard it is for me.. Ah well, as I said, life goes on. I'm not gonna make the same mistake twice, it's just not me.

You're like a storm against the window.
Follow me around just like a shadow.
I’ll swim a never-ending ocean,
until you bring back your devotion.

It’s like I live a thousand lifetimes.
Still looking for the one that feels right.
See, moving on just isn’t working;
you lit the fire that I’m burning.

And all I can do is protect it,
A lie for the sake of my pride.
While all the others had me thinking,
we could be more than just amazing.

I guess I’m holding on to my faith.
A silent hope I’m heading your way.
And crawling over is so tempting;
We could be more than just amazing.

Miss my Bitch more than ever

There's no holding back and there's no letting go.

Feels like I haven't been writing here for a while. Today it's Sunday again (booh)
My birthday party was the bestest ever ;) Haven't had that much fun or been that drunk since looong time ago =)




I will never be with anybody else, If I can't have you

Today has been a nice day. One lesson and then we watched 4 episodes of O.C =) Was nice, even though I couldn't sit still for long. I'm going to Traversen soon to work. I'm so happy I don't have to work on Friday =) Friday is gonna be paaaarty =D

Hold On, Little Girl
Show Me What He's Done To You
Stand Up, Little Girl
A Broken Heart Can't Be That Bad

When It's Through, It's Through
Fate Could Twist The Both Of You
So Come On Baby, Come On Over
Let Me Be The One To Show You


yeah you're right..

Fuck this
I guess it's time to start it all over again.

Waheey!
I passed both my exams ;) Lovely. Which means early christmas break for me, mwahaha!
I think Bella should come home so I can kindly tell her to party with me tonight.

Well I passed one exam. (If I didn't write that before) but I still don't know about the Organisation. I'm hoping for the best.
Anna is going home tomorrow for the weekend. Which leaves me with a boring weekend without private jokes =P haha.. naah I'm sure I can find something fun to do =)

Right now I'm waiting for something fun to start on TV or waiting for Anna to finish her blog so I can read it. (she told me I had to)
Oh and to something totally different. I bought phösar sunglasses when I was in Linköping.

over and out

My darling.. who knew?
Who knew things could change so fast. Without any of us noticing or wanting the change. Is it too late to go back to the way things used to be? I wish I could still call you a friend..

When you can't speak and you know what it's like to be lonely
Don't even bother to phone me, cos I'll be alright in the end
It's not that you're breaking my heart
I'm just losing a friend..

Today has been one of those days. Too bad. I'm so tried, gonna sleep early.

Back in Skellefteå
Yeah I came home yesterday. It's nice to be back but it was nice to go home and visit as well.
Marie - Nice with a movie after all =)
Cissi - Meet you halfway? =) Don't get caught in the bushes.

I hate
things that has anything to do with planes, snow, storms or airports. I'm stuck at Arlanda and has been for a while and will probably be for another hour or so.

Pissed off with the weather!!